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Which matchmaking sites should you use?

Or should you even be using matchmaking sites or dating agencies at all? Are they best way to find your perfect partner? Or are they just wasting your time and money?

But before I tell you the answer to that, I need to be clear what we’re talking about here.

There are lots of online matchmaking sites calling themselves ‘matchmakers’ or ‘dating agencies’ when they’re nothing of the sort. They are simply internet dating sites.

Dating sites are very effective when you want to find a date. Just don’t fall for their marketing hype that they’re the experts in finding you a brilliant match.

No. What we’re talking about here are the traditional matchmakers and dating agencies.  Please excuse me if I lump the two together to keep this short.

They’re the people that meet with you. Get to know you. And search through and introduce you to someone on their database who they think will be a good match.

Is matchmaking right for you?

Well, it might be controversial. But experience (and the experts) say matchmakers are not all they’re cracked up to be.

I’m not saying you can’t find a match with them, only that times have moved on and there are better, more effective ways to do it these days.

Why?

Let me explain. By the way – if you’re convinced you want to use them, just skip this section.

The disadvantages of matchmaking & dating agencies

Matchmaking has that elusive pull to it. It’s not just dating, it’s about finding a match for you. It almost makes you tingle inside with anticipation. But there are several reasons the reality doesn’t normally live up to the dream.

They miss important matching factors

To be honest, most of the matchmaking that’s offered out there is shallow.

What hair colour do you want? How tall is your ideal partner? What hobbies are you into?

Let me throw you this scenario. You meet a potential boyfriend. He’s drop dead gorgeous. You feel total chemistry with him. If you’re being honest you’re desperate to take him straight back to your place but then you think, ‘Hmm. He isn’t into scuba diving. Nah, forget it.’

It just isn’t going to happen. Hobbies, hair colour and physical measurements rarely have the importance that the matchmaking sites seem to place on them.

On the upside, matchmakers are less guilty of this than internet dating sites. And I’m probably doing a few of them a disservice here. But there’s a lot of evidence that the matchmaking that goes on is done at a very superficial level. Just take a bit of a surf around the net if you don’t believe me.

You can do a much more thorough job yourselfusing all the matching factors that really matter when looking for a truly compatible partner.

Much Lower Numbers

Internet dating sites these days have hundreds of thousands, if not millions of people on their database. Dating agencies, even if they’re big, will have thousands at best. Most won’t even have that.

The likelihood is that you’re going to see very few dates as a result of signing up.

You can end up on a significant date with unsuitable matches

On a speed date, at worst, you end up talking to an unsuitable match for 3 minutes. With introductions through agencies you just get that feeling that because you’re meeting fewer people, you should go on more significant dates.

My advice, even though the numbers may be low just meet them for a coffee to start with. That way, if there’s no chemistry, you still have the chance to end it quickly.

It’s going to cost you

Dating agency fees can be high. For matchmakers they can be astronomical. Not good value for money. You’d waste less money standing on a street corner writing your telephone number on £20 notes and handing them out to the people you fancied. Ouch!

Is it all bad news?

No.

If you want someone else to do the work for you and you’re prepared to pay for it, agencies can do the leg work. At the end of the day, if they’re churning up enough dates for you to meet with, it doesn’t matter too much that they are matching you on shallow factors.

But don’t be mislead into thinking that they’re doing a much better job than you could. And there’s no agency out there that I’ve heard about that can generate the numbers of dates that you can yourself.

Dating Agencies

I’m only putting these in here because it’s probably what you came searching for when you found this page. Hopefully you can see by now there are better options than using agencies and matchmakers. If you still want to use an agency, here’s a couple of UK dating agencies that get a good name:

Avenues

Sara Eden



       

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